Sunday, March 2, 2008

BTALD: Trouble parking? Don't!

Parking is so weird. It's a by-product of the fact that when we go places, we take with us this big metal thing that we have to shed when we get to our destination. So we paint lines all over the ground and have all these rules about where you can put the metal thing, and where you can't. And which direction it should be facing. Unless you're in Britain, where apparently it's okay to just pull over whatever way you happen to be. I love that.
I am a self-admitted parking snob. I place a certain amount of my self-worth on how well I park. If I take up too much space by being too far over, I consider myself a bad person. I apply this to everyone else too. This is dumb. But I do it.
There is a parking garage in San Francisco that has regular sized spaces around the outside, but these eensy-weensy ones in the middle, mostly obstructed by poles. I've brought home my fair share of paint samples (bright blue mostly, I think that's Level 3) from that garage. It's amusing to watch people in enormous vehicles go into, and out of, these little spaces and eventually give up. Probably taking some of their own paint samples.
Anyway, I will never understand why everyone in the universe does not want to go everywhere by train. You can be exhausted. You can be drunk (or sobering up). You can read. You can work. You can meditate. And, you don't have to park. I mean, it just doesn't get any better. It's the greatest thing to just get off the train and walk to wherever. And, while you're on there, you can look at the person next to you and say, "You know, I'm a terrible driver. And I can't park worth a damn either. And it doesn't matter!"

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